


Railroaded

by GlassesOfJustice



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fandom Giftbox: Treat, Gen, Male-Female Friendship, Missing Scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-22
Updated: 2018-09-22
Packaged: 2019-07-15 10:02:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16060808
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GlassesOfJustice/pseuds/GlassesOfJustice
Summary: 5 times Monique Jefferies tries to make sense of being put on desk duty.





	Railroaded

**Author's Note:**

  * For [dawittiest](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dawittiest/gifts).



> Thank you to my lovely wife and beta [lusciousladyluck](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lusciousladyluck) for making this piece better and for being an Olivia/Alex fan all those many moons ago.

**Cragen**

The squad room was bustling. Cragen poked his head out of his office and his booming voice called out, “Jefferies? My office.”

Jefferies slumped into the chair opposite Cragen. She took a hard look at him and knew her fate. Words came out of her Captain’s mouth but she wasn’t hearing them. She felt it the moment she was summoned. A punch in the gut. Brain dizzy and swirling with unconnected thoughts.

“It’s like that then?” She finally said when the voice across from her stopped.

“Monique, the Morris Commission—”

“Don’t. Let’s not pretend this is about public safety.”

“Jefferies…”

“Don. It didn’t have to go down this way.”

“But here we are. You slept with a suspect, told the shrink about it and now you’ve landed yourself in a desk until further notice.”

“But Captain—”

“End of story, Jefferies.”

She got up slowly and walked out, leaving the door ajar in her wake. 

She was only back at her desk for a few minutes when she saw the Captain barrel out of the squad room. An attractive man in a red, white, and black track jacket and black jeans with a long gold chain approached. He was holding a file and looked lost and out of place. 

“Monique Jefferies. Maybe I can help?” She said. She thought about getting his number.

“Fin Tutuola, I’ve been reassigned.”

“Huh. You’re here for my job.”

He let out a heavy breath and crossed his arms. “Oh. This is awkward.”

Jefferies’ smile was big and out of place. “Try my side of the moment.”

**Benson**

The Crib was quiet when she went to clear her head. She mindlessly opened her locker, but didn’t pull anything out. There wasn’t much in it. She didn’t have kids photos tacked up like Stabler. But for awhile she just stood there staring into the empty container.

“Hey.” Olivia said gently from behind. 

Jefferies startled and smacked into her open locker door. “Fuck, Olivia. You scared the shit out of me.”

“Sorry. We’re heading out to a call, I just wanted to catch you before we left.”

“I don’t need your pity.” Jefferies replied. Bitter about being startled, bitter about being sequestered to desk duty. Hell, bitter they had to have this discussion.

“I know we are not partners. But you are a good cop. You know where to find me if you need me.”

When Jefferies pulled her head out of her locker to tell Olivia she wasn’t safe. That the men would always protect the men, she was already gone. She took a deep breath and then slammed her locker closed.

“Fuck ‘em.”

**Stabler**

The elevator was nearly closed when Stabler slid into it. Jefferies has propped herself against the corner.

“If it isn’t the golden boy.” Jefferies said under her breath. 

“Do we have a problem?” Stabler said glancing over. 

“Nope. No problem. Just funny how women having orgasms are more concerning than men fantasizing about vigilante murder. Re-evaluation my ass.” Her tone is anything but light.

“I’m not doing this with you. I have a family to take care of. And, since when did thinking about doing something become the same as doing it?” Stabler spat.

“Keep telling yourself that Stabler, it sounds like you need to go to confession. You’re an anger ball and a bit of a loose cannon but always get to hide behind being a family man. It’s going to catch up with you sooner or later." Jefferies' eyes never left the elevator doors.

"Best watch yourself before you boil over.” Her voice was too quiet to land as a warning. 

The elevator doors crawled open and Stabler bolted out toward his Crown Vic.

Jefferies pushed off the elevator wall and as she exited the elevator said, “Guess I won’t be seeing you around.”

**Cabot**

The door to Cabot’s office was closed, but her desk lamp glowed through the door. Jefferies wasn’t sure how she ended up there, but rapt on the door before she could change her mind.

“Come in” Cabot called from inside.

When Jefferies presented herself, Cabot shifted uncomfortably in her seat. Reluctantly, she extended her hand gesturing for Jefferies to sit down.

“Detective Jefferies, it’s late. What can I do for you?”

“I don’t know. You tell me.” She said, despondent. The weight of the Morris Commission's decision finally settled on her.

“Right. Monique, look, I’m sorry. There wasn’t anything I could do.”

“Tell me one thing?”

“I can try.” Cabot replied tentatively.

“So, I almost get killed in the line of duty. I manage not to. I deal with it. I cope. I try to. So, I chose sex as a coping mechanism. Seems to be a personal decision to me. Better than drugs? Right? Alcohol? We know how that turns out.”

“Monique, I really think—”

“No, I’m not done. I spoke to the shrink. Like I’m _asked_ to do. And what? That’s not good enough? The truth is a problem no one is willing to deal with? Suddenly blowing off some steam with a few one night stands here or there makes me unfit to be a cop? Alex, what happened?”

“Monique. You know that’s not what happened. And, I really shouldn’t be discussing this with you.” Cabot’s voice was steady, not cold but similar to how a kindergarten teacher reprimands her kids.

Jefferies’ chin fell and her eyes gazed into her lap. 

“One mistake. I’m not allowed one mistake?” Not that she acknowledged to herself it was a mistake, but everyone else seemed to think so.

Her anger returned and she stared Cabot down. “How many times has Stabler been in trouble over the years? It really is a brotherhood isn’t it? Why did I think someone would go to bat for me? Tell me that, Alex.”

“Monique. Look, we don’t know each other well. Can I recommend that you see someone? You need to deal with these issues. Both the accident, and the consequences of your actions. Can I give you the name of a friend of mine? She is a great therapist.” Cabot strained to conform her face into a sympathetic shape, but the guilt came through anyway.

“More shrinks? I think I’ll pass.” Jefferies stands up to leave. 

“Let me at least call you a car. I don’t think you should be driving.” Cabot was genuinely worried.

“It’s New York City. I’ll walk. The fresh air will be good for me.” Jefferies was calmer then, but the speed in which she cycled through emotions scared even herself.

“I’m sorry.” Cabot managed to murmur to Monique’s back.

Cabot stayed in her office alone for a long time that night. She promised herself she would do better. And she promised herself she would get to know Olivia. To proactively look out for the other women around her. If nothing else, she owed Jefferies that.

**Munch**

Before she left the precinct she left a note on Munch’s desk to meet her at Jimmy’s on West 44th at 9pm. When she walked in, he was waiting for her, beer partially imbibed.

She slid into the chair across from him casually, as if she hadn’t been benched earlier that day. He tilted his head and took too long giving her the once over. She flinched and broke eye contact. 

“Did you want to grab a beer?” 

“No, I better not. It’s been a long day. I feel wrung out, you know?”

Munch nodded and picked up his own glass, water pooled where the edge met the table.

“I’m sorry you know.” He said. 

“I’m sorry too.” She said.

They were quiet for a long time. What can be said?

“I should have told you never to talk to the headshrinkers. You have to...you know what? It doesn’t matter now. I’m sorry. I really am.”

Jefferies body was slumped in the chair. The implications of the day pushed her down.

“You are a good partner, John. A good friend too. Thanks for coming.” 

“Hey, you know I’m not making a scene in the precinct. Seriously, I couldn’t not come and say my peace. Thanks for putting up with me. Conspiracies and all.” He smiled at that. 

So did she.

“What are you going to do?” He lightly prodded.

“I have no idea. Too early to say I think. I’m not sure it’s worth fighting it. But, I want to. This job is truly all I have.” She laughed so she didn’t cry. She rubbed her hands on her slacks then clasped them on the table in front of her. She still hadn’t been home. Had been wondering the streets since she left Cabot’s office. 

“I guess it’s time for me to go home. I’m exhausted. Sorry, I’m not up for knocking back a few tonight.”

“No, I get it. Give me 5 minutes to finish this and I’ll walk you home.” 

“You sure? You’re not taking pity on me are you John?” Jefferies wanted to confirm.

“No. Just looking out for a friend.”

He finished his beer in two large gulps and deposited his cup on the table with a thud.

“Okay, after you.” He said as he got up from the table.

Jefferies didn’t say another word as she stood and moved toward the door.

The air was warm for late September, but Jefferies’ chartreuse shirt was damp from wondering earlier and it sent a chill through her. The street outside the dive bar was unusually quiet. They turned toward Jefferies’ apartment and half way down the block Munch draped his suit coat over her and pulled her into his side. They carried on that way, Monique under John’s arm, leaning into his warm embrace.


End file.
